And you thought the space hotel was embarrassing*

From CNN:

Now an Austrian company wants to extend this opportunity for deep-dive delights to the world of superyachts, by building customized private submersibles that can descend 250 meters (820 feet) beneath the ocean surface and remain submerged for up to four weeks.

Migaloo has revealed its ambitious plans for what it claims will be the “world’s one and only private submersible superyacht,” offering “a not-yet-existing alternative to large privately owned surface vessels.”

This submarine, named M5, would measure 165.8 meters in length and 23 meters across at its widest point, with a range of around 15,000 kilometers and a speed of up to 20 knots when surfaced (or 12 knots when underwater). However, says Migaloo, “The wished dimensions of the submarine-yacht hybrid, the exterior styling and the interior design are up to the owners’ preferences.”

So, like any billionaires’ superyacht worth its salt, the default design includes a helipad, a swimming pool and spa, a gym, art gallery cinema, party area with DJ booth, along with plenty of spaces to lounge or dine. Optional extras include a hot air balloon and underwater shark-feeding station.

 It's also a practical place to keep your valuables in case of pirates, solar flares, pole shifts.

Also suitable for Ice Station Zebra cosplay.

CNN had lots of competition on this story.

It took me at most ten minutes on LinkedIn to establish that this company claiming it could design and build the civilian equivalent of an Ohio class submarine was a transparent fraud. This company doesn't have the resources to design a functioning toy sub for your bathtub.

Amber DaSilva of Jalopnik had the same thought, pointing out that CEO Christian Gumpold was the only listed employee. DaSilva also went the extra mile and dug up more than anyone needed to know about the company.

Migaloo’s website dates back to 2013, according to WHOIS records, but the oldest version archived is from 2015. Back then, the company was offering “submersible superyachts” in cooperation with a company called Starkad Technologies OÜ, which provided “technical development.” Starkad does show up in Estonian business records, but the company’s 2023 annual report shows just one employee — and an annual operating budget of just under $2,700. The company’s official contact email is a Hotmail account. 

...

Rather than creating actual submarines for the world’s richest few, Migaloo appears to create pictures of submarines for magazines read by those richest few (and, of course, NFTs.) It’s unclear what the company would even do if a Bezos or a Musk called them up with $2 billion in hand — it’s unlikely a single person in Estonia could actually assemble anything the company proffers.

 The standard comeback is what's the harm? Some guy creates some silly images borrowed from a post-war issue of Galaxy magazine and we all have fun pretending. The trouble is our weakness for hoary sci-fi fantasies, our willingness to accept laughable pitches for obvious snake oil has created large fortunes for con artists, diverted resources from promising tech and real solutions, and distorted our sense of the future.

And the CGI really isn't that good.

*OK, maybe this is more embarrassing.